10 Things Dog Owners Should Never Say to Runners

Dedicated to all the leg-humping-teeth-baring carnivores out there.

After conducting an enlightening poll of runners about dog encounters, I've come up with some statements that dog owners should never say to runners.  It's not so much that the dog is the problem, it's the ridiculous statements their owners make to runners and other non-tethered folks.  Don't get me wrong, I love dogs and most dog owners.  I just find you funny and obnoxious.

It's OK, he's friendly!  As person's dog lunges and bears its teeth at runner.  If you have to say he's friendly, there's a problem.

He really likes you!   This either means the dog just humped your leg, jumped up on you, or is wiggling his body like the wound-up-under-exercised-ADD dog that he is.  Also goes along with "Oh sorry she's still a puppy." An apparent excuse for bad behavior and leg sex.

Oh sorry, she's still a puppy.  That explains why the 100 pound dog just jumped up on me.

She's just scared.  I'd say that looks more like some serious carnivorous intentions.

She won't bite.  If you have to say this, then she really might bite and I'm not coming anywhere near that piranha on a leash.The next thing these owners are likely to say is:

Oh my, he's never done THAT before. Well, thanks for clarifying and not apologizing. 

He has a high prey drive. No way! Is that why he just ran off into the bushes after that squirrel?

He's afraid of kids. I call that aggressive and dangerous.

She loves giving kisses.  Actually, I think she likes salt and has a penchant for french kissing.

He's in training. You mean you're in training?  Dogs respond to their owner's behavior. Good leadership equals good dog behavior.

Now go walk your dog and please don't forget to pick up your little baggies of shit. 

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