The Monster in the Basement


Recently a creature has been frequenting our basement and I'm not quite sure what to do with it.

It's loud and annoying and a little bit scary. It grunts and gasps and barks and yelps. It thuds and slams and even shrieks.

The beast cackles and guffaws and makes sudden explosive "HA!" and "YEAH!" sounds. Worst of all, it sings off-key, loudly and nonsensically, because it has on headphones and can't hear itself and also can't remember lyrics so it makes shit up. The creature also sometimes takes off its shirt when it gets hot and prances around in indecently in just a bra. Well, two bras, actually, because it doesn't like to bounce.

Yep, as you may have guessed by now, the monster in the basement is... me.


The good news, is that all the racket I make when I'm down in our basement DIY home gym, listening to my favorite playlist and dancing on the elliptical, is just the sound of enthusiasm and energy! I am not in pain or being attacked by zombies even though it may sometimes sound that way. But when the music wells to a chorus and my brain chemistry reaches the "Explode!" stage, I find it difficult to contain myself and I act like a crazy person.

Note: this ecstatic and ridiculous state doesn't happen every time, but only after a LOT of coffee and when awesome songs come up on my playlist.

Our home gym space, which we only have in the summer, is relatively private, so I can get away with being a total asshole. The Lobster is not nearly as obnoxious, but she too likes to sing along to headphones.

The problem? I need to return to the neighborhood gym in the fall. At some point, I'm going to have to lock this monster deep within in the basement of my mind, and stop indulging in grunting, gasping, yelling, singing, or inappropriate butt-wiggling when I work out. (I'm pretty sure that I can at least keep the beast fully clothed). I'll have to go back to silently mouthing along to songs, and I'll tone down my dancing a few notches, and I'll just be somewhat weirdly over-enthusiastic in a quiet way.

Because while I know first hand the joys of making noise while exercising, I can also work myself up into a lovely state of umbrage when others make excessive noise in gyms... slamming down their weights, having loud cell-phone conversations, grunting, singing, etc.

Is there any point to this blog post? Er, not really!

I guess I'm just curious:

Does anyone else have a beast within that likes to get a little crazy when exercising in private?

And does anyone else find it annoying when others make a lot of noise in public spaces?

Monster image found at Maria Brophy's site.

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